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Your Listing May Be Haunted If...
Do your sellers seem a little too eager to move out? Are buyers hesitant to hang around? If so, you may be dealing with a haunted house. Here are some tell-tale signs that your listing may be haunted.
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13 Spooky Listing Photos that Will Terrify Prospects
'Tis the season for ghouls, ghosts, and all things that go bump in the night. However, if you're looking for something really scary, you need only look at some of the listing photos uploaded to MLSs around the country. Often, the most frightening thing about a bad property photo is that an agent thought it would somehow attract potential buyers. In the spirit of the season (and a good laugh), we've rounded up 13 of the scariest listing photos around. 1. Heeere's Johnny! The best way to show how "open and airy" your new listing is? Frame a random person in the hacked up opening of the basement door. Bonus points for flash-induced red-eye. It only adds to that perfect "The Shining" vibe! Tip: Keep people (and pets) out of your listing photos. Insist that your sellers be out of the house--or at least far from the room you're currently shooting. That also means no accidental appearances of the photographer in the bathroom mirror! There's no hope for that basement door, though.
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19 Real Estate Memes and GIFs that Will Make You Smile
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57 Hilariously Terrible Real Estate Photos
Where would your dream home be? Would it be a rustic farm hidden in the woods or maybe a luxury condo in Manhattan? Would the interior be more traditional, have shiplap walls, or the latest modern trend? Yes, we love great real estate photos that really capture the perfect house. This post, though, is a tribute to the other kind that we've all seen.
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5 Real Estate Problems that Are All Too True
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10 Signs You're Married to a Real Estate Agent
"I can't quite place my finger on it, but I'm having suspicions that my husband is secretly pursuing a real estate career. Am I being crazy?" –Befuddled in Boise We get this question – and others along the same lines – all the time. It's time we address the issue of real estate agents in our communities head on. How to Identify a Real Estate Agent Real estate agents are all around you. They are your neighbors, your cousins, your brothers and sisters. Chances are good that a real estate agent sold you your house or manages your apartment complex. According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, at any given time, there are 422,000 real estate agents living among us. Their kids go to school with your kids. They may be sitting next to you at a football game. A few of them are even able to keep up the appearance of normalcy. Scientists aren't sure where real estate agents come from, though most are easy to spot. They send signals to each other by wearing small tokens of real estate agentism called "nametags" on their coats. These tokens not only communicate to potential clients what to call them, but with other signifiers, such as distinctively colored overcoats, may indicate tribal affiliation and status – much in the same way a silverback indicates the status of a gorilla. Some agents do not operate openly, however. Instead, they maintain "day jobs" during the week while sneaking off to "networking functions" at night, under the cover of darkness, and to "open houses" on the weekends, where they engage in elaborate rituals in an effort to find clients, listings and other like-minded people.
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How NOT to Succeed in Real Estate
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7 Funny Things Real Estate Agents Do
Real estate agents mean serious business... most of the time. But every now and again we have to take a minute to laugh at ourselves. Probably no other job can be as stressful, as rewarding and, happily, as humorous. And now, as the joke goes, you might be a real estate agent if... 1. You're powered by coffee Can you relate? We can. More coffee please! 2. You steal furniture (from yourself) A staged home is a sold home, right? And if your clients don't have exactly the right pieces or budget to stage their home to sell, you may have been known to "borrow" things from your own house. And from your friend's and family's homes too. After all, when your listings sell quickly, everyone benefits!
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13 Listing Photos that Will Scare Prospects Away
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10 Real Estate Agent Problems
Every job comes with a unique set of problems and being a real estate agent is no exception! If you're ever looking for a laugh, we highly recommend you check out the #realtorproblems hashtag on both Twitter and Instagram. Today we're sharing 10 of the funniest recent posts:
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#RealtorProblems That Only Happen in Winter
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6 Ways Real Estate Agents Are Like Han Solo
Working in the real estate industry is surprisingly similar to living the life of Han Solo, the suave, cynical yet charming inter-stellar smuggler of the Star Wars universe. Don't believe us? Consider these six parallels and you'll see how your local Realtor is essentially the same as this infamous Corellian scoundrel. They Never Stop Working Han Solo: "Not a bad bit of rescuing, huh? You know, sometimes I amaze even myself." Princess Leia: "That doesn't sound too hard." Smuggling isn't a job; it's a lifestyle. Han Solo does not have the luxuries afforded by a 9-to-5 career – he cannot simply "leave work at work." Instead, Solo's "off time" is spent trying to stay alive in backwater spaceports or outrunning Imperial cruisers in the cold vacuum of space. Solo's many rivals and enemies, like the terrifying bounty hunter Boba Fett, would refuse to recognize his vacation time were he silly enough to try and take some. Real estate agents also never stop working. The nature of the real estate business means agents must always be ready to take customer calls and only rarely have the opportunity to go on vacation. Agents' hours are generally long and they frequently work during weekends and evenings. An unfortunate fact of life for them is that the agents who make themselves unavailable – even momentarily – are the agents who lose business.
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How to Buy a House – As Told by Memes
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Funny Real Estate: Christmas Edition
The holidays are right around the corner, agents! For real estate, it's a time of hustle and bustle, year-end figures and next year business planning. So how about a little something to lighten the mood? We've scoured the depths of the Internet to find an assortment of funny real estate comics and bad listing photos that celebrate the season. Put down those listing brochures, pour yourself an eggnog, sit back and prepare for a chuckle. Listing Photos Great news! This listing has a window. And a tall, skinny tree. Or a flagpole. Or maybe a lightning rod. And possibly not a roof. Whatever happened to sitting on Santa's lap?
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Exterior Home Photography: What NOT To Do
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House Poor: The Landlord's Prayer
Believe me, the last thing in life I ever wanted to be was a landlord. The thought of it reminds me of the old silent movies tying his poor tenant to a railroad track as she screams, "No, I can't pay the rent!" It started at one of our Friday coffees at the Deli Delight where I get together with my real estate team—Bea Meriwether, real estate agent and Earnest S. Crowe, mortgage guy. Bea was selling a bank-owned bungalow two blocks away from me in my hometown of Mirage Mills, the Chernobyl of American real estate and the epicenter of the foreclosure crisis. Since there were two dozen fire sale-priced properties listed for sale within a mile of hers, she was having a hard time. "It would be a perfect investment property for you and Felicia. You know the neighborhood like the back of your hand. It's close and easy for you to manage. It's in very good shape for the neighborhood and it's priced to move fast," said Bea. Her voice dropped a half-octave and she gently placed her hand on mine. "And I know that the bank is dying on this one. They've taken a beating on it for more than a year and they'll do anything to get it off the books." Nothing she said changed my mind. The bank could go on taking a beating for all I cared. Then Earnest started in on me. "Homer, wise up dude. How much you making on your 401K in this market? I'll bet you're losing money big time." How did he know?
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Is there a market for haunted homes?
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Being A REALTOR® IS EASY! Anyone Can Be A Real Estate Agent
We've been in business since 1997. Every week or two, we hear a story from a client or prospective client that reminds us that the public at large has no idea what it takes to be a REALTOR®. The stories we hear are always funny, and ALWAYS make us laugh. Obviously these stories are funny to us, because the public is uninformed and doesn't know what's going on. We realize though, that it's not funny to you, the REALTOR®. To those ends, this week, we figured we'd make a video to expose these stereotypes, make you laugh, and make you enjoy your day, just a little more. Our friends, please enjoy! Click through to the next page to view the video.
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House Poor: Big Losers and Short Sales
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11 Entertaining Facts About Losing, Damaging and Getting Back Your Smartphone!
Your cell phone is what connects you to important phone numbers, including clients' contact info, text messages, past and present, and if you have a smart phone, many real estate professionals consider it their lifeline! Now, if you haven't stored your data through your wireless server provider, a cyber cloud somewhere, or just don't want to pay for insurance and a pretty decent deductible, you may be willing to do just about anything to retrieve your phone if something happens to it. Have you ever had your phone fall into the...yea you know...the throne, AKA the toilet? Did you reach in right away, because you had a client to follow up with or a mortgage lender expecting your call? Perhaps you take your phone every place that you really shouldn't because it's always attached to you, as the gentleman is humorously portraying in the photo. T-mobile and Kelton Research recently released a survey citing some very amusing ways that phones have been lost or damaged. The results are quite entertaining and you may not be the only one willing to push the limits to save your precious device.
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Google Opt Out Feature Lets Users Protect Privacy By Moving To Remote Village
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HP Unveils Non-Computer For Those Who Don't Need A Computer
TheOnion.com—PALO ALTO, CA—Hewlett-Packard announced Friday the release of the first-ever non-computer, a fully unusable device specially designed to address the demands of individuals who have absolutely no need to own a computer.
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Back in the Days When Cell Phone Calls Were Rude...
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Sometimes Being "Techy" Is Not Always Enough
What type of qualities do you look for when you evaluate who to consult with for your technology solutions? Just because a vendor is young, hip and has technology coming out their ears, does not mean they: 1.) Know what they are talking about 2.) Have any experience to offer you But, if you are looking for a hilarious hybrid of surfer and techie, and need a break this Friday, you may appreciate how ridiculous these two start-up geeks sound. Don't worry, at RETechnology's product databases you won't find yourselves connecting to characters like these two.
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A T-Mobile Royal Wedding Tribute
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Whose Shoes Are You Standing In?
Take a look at a home. How does it look... through the eyes of the owner... appraiser... lender... or buyer? Do they see the home the same way? Hmmm... Watch this short video to see what perceptions shape the realities of real estate.
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CIA's Facebook Program Dramatically Cut Agency's Costs
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Study: Only Takes 4 Minutes to Go From Funny to Irritating
The Onion News Network is the Saturday Night Live of news reporting. Creating humor from seemingly thin air, the creators of this hilarious media database enjoy creating newsworthy articles and videos based not at all on news.  I subscribe to all their channels and highly recommend you do as well.  Not convinced? Well, keep reading. They recently posted a study called "Threshold of Percieved Humor." This one is good. The following was taken from the Onion's online news section.
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Google's April Fool's Joke!
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What Happens When the Technology We Invent Takes Over?
What happens when we over-invent to such a degree that our technology begins to control us? The Onion News Network took some time to explore this phenomena. Continue to see their unique news coverage...    
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3 Entertaining Real Estate Advertisements
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iPad 2: It's Here!
Just when I thought there were no more opportunities to poke fun at Apple, I get a Facebook message from one of our devoted RETechnology.com subscribers asking me why I haven't made fun of the iPad 2 yet.  And here I thought our weekly funnies were for our inhouse benefit alone. Silly me. At RETechnology.com we aim to please our subscribers and hate to see them hanging in the balance of unmet expectations.  So, without further ado, what we have all been waiting for...
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Taking a Sales Pitch to a New Low
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Trouble with Twitters!
"Just woke up to the sound of my alarm.... ahh!" "FYI- I am moving on Saturday and need boxes - have any?" "If they say TVs are so bad for you then why do they have one in every hospital room?" "Mac or PC?" "I'm so cool I make the ice cubes shiver!" Do you ever get the feeling that your Twitter feed is a stream of too much virtual consciousness? SuperNews recently created a cartoon to showcase the ridiculous side of Twitter... when used for musings, ramblings, and other dead giveaways to social isolation.
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Salespeople Rock!
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iPad Pitch for Grandma! She'll Love It!
I don't know about your Grandmother (or mother) but if she's anything like mine, she has already adopted Facebook and while the going was a little slow at first, she is an avid commenter and socialite. Facebook to Apple products isn't that far of a leap, and now she is eyeing the new iPad. Not so new to all of her grandkids, but to her, it's a technology that is lightyears ahead of anything she saw growing up in the dust bowl during the Depression. If you too would like your Grandma to lead the WWII or baby boomer generation in technology adoption, consider this pitch!  Ahh... the high points of the iPad!
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Middle Ages Tech Support
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Cell Phone Call Gone Wrong...
It's just a call... In a dressing room... Between a preoccupied man and a woman who is shopping. What could possible go wrong?
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How Will the End of Print Journalism Affect Pack Rats?
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Drive Your Technology Use to a New Level in 2011
In today's world of mobile devices, productivity is not restricted to the office. Gary Chambers, a Real Estate Broker and Grain Farmer, uses technology to run two businesses simultaneously.  Not only is working from Gary Chamber's field office productive thanks to the GPS steering of his John Deere tractor, but he says it has less distractions than being in his real estate office! Enjoy watching smartphones, laptops and GPS systems work together to advance Gary's two businesses! If you would like to see this drumhellerrealtor video on YouTube.com, please click here.
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Geek Out! Twas the Night Before Christmas
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Happy Holidaze
Technology unlocks whole new dimensions of humor to us all.  Around the office a funny video staring a hilarious smattering of animals proves just this. Enjoy the melodious sounds of these animals. Deck the Halls with humor! This is for all you animal lovers out there!
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Twitter Spoof of the Office
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One Way an iPad Won't Replace a Newspaper...
Who is that person in your life who lounges in their pajama's for hours, enjoying a good ol' cup of joe while crinkling through the local newspaper? Ah, those were the days! Before newspapers people would have to wait for their neighborhood gossips to stop by and fill you in on the "happenings."  Now, we are seeing a shift away from newspapers as the Internet, mobile devices and tablets start to take over. In many ways tablets are superior to newspapers.  I will give you that they may not have the same romance about them as that morning coffee and newspaper reading, but in 15 years, it just may become a sentimental past time for techy people who have moved on to newer technology solutions. Newsday did a great job hilariously articulating the superiority of the iPad (in this case) over the newspaper.  However, they did find one glitch in the system.
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Will an iPad Blend?
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Newest Apps from Apple: iCall and iHangup!
"There's an app for that!" Isn't there? Oh yes, app developers around the world are creating mobile applications for almost anything.  Personal favorites include: 1.) Pocket girlfriend- Show your friends pictures of a girl you haven't met, don't know anything about, and call her your girlfriend!  Works in the real world. Oh wait, who are we kidding? No it doesn't. 2.) Free Alarm Clock - Just in case the one that already came on your iPhone wasn't good enough, download another free one. 3.) Airport Sounds - Just when you start to miss the obnoxious hustle and bustle and heartless announcements of an airport... 4.) Cry Translator - Possibly my favorite. Parents of a presumably younger child can hold their phone up to their baby when he/she is crying, and the app translates the cry.  Possibly translations include: hungry, tired, wants a toy, needs a new diaper, or wants a pacifier. Oh, and then it gives "suggestions" as to what that parent is supposed to do in each case. But that's not all. Apple has been working hard on creating what they call a "game-changer" app. The iCall app.  Oh, and the complimentary app, iHangup. Seriously, there's even video proof of this phenomena!
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Are You Stuck in the Past?
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No Human Touch- Baby Complains About Call Center
Customer service has been much aided by technology.  We can now automate responses, never miss a call and keep track of all the inbound numbers and messages.  Companies can set up 24/7 customer service and generate computer responses. However, a common complaint in the industry is the lack of human touch.  Surprisingly people respond better to people than they do computers.  This comes at a shock to many of us.  But it seems true, even the children are crying out for a more human element in call centers.  Watch this video about a baby expressing his grievances.
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Fox4 Roast of Social Media
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Dancing is Contagious
Stand out from the crowd.  Chances are if you're having as much fun doing your own thing and experimenting with your own techniques, many will join you. Take the following little girl, and a happy little dance. Take away: Once you've mastered technology and do a little dance, others will join!  Be a trend setter!
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The Perfect Buyer?
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To Be or Not to Be? In This Case, Not to Be!
Are you discrouaged in your work? Sometimes it's more effective to inspire yourself by looking at a bad example.  If you need a good laugh, have ever thought of "whisper marketing" or thought twice about using a lockbox to squat on someone's home, then this video is for you. Courtsey of Harris Group, a crafty group of Canadian real estate professionals who employ a humorous angle in their marketing efforts. As 40% of homebuyers from 2009 were Gen Y's, "edutainment" (education+entertainment) is a proven method to market to this demographic.  With that in mind, enjoy this short video!
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Apple Introduces a Revolutionary New Laptop with No Keyboard!
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Ethel's First... What's the Word?... Online Video!
As real estate professionals, the use of video to portray your image, professionalism and even intelect is powerful.  The topics you choose to center your videos around, your attention span in those videos and the level of viewer engagement within your video can make or break your audience's faith in you. Don't believe me, well... apparently neither did Ethel. Karel Murray, a professional speaker and humorist, created a funny sketch about Ethel's first adventure with video technology. Ethel is one of Karel Murray's favorite characters.  In her words, "Ethel is a clueless woman who has exceptional self-esteem and a heart for adventure." Enjoy her first video blunder... and maybe in the process pick up a few hints on what not to do in your own real estate videos.  Happy Friday to you all! The above video can be found on YouTube.com, by clicking here.
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New Apple Friend Bar Gives Customers Someone To Talk At About Mac Products
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New Google Phone Service Whispers Targeted Ads Directly Into Users' Ears
Online advertising IQ is on the rise!  We see it on Facebook all the time.  Have you ever noticed how the advertisements on Facebook always target themes on your wall posts? For example, last week my friend posted on my wall, complaining about the loneliness of her Saturday night.  What do you think Facebook ads did?  Well they produced an advertisement for free iDating! Smart marketing, however embarrassing it is to have your friends alerted to your seemingly desperate dating status via intuitive advertising. What would happen if Google picked up this target marketing idea and applied it to their phone service?  Onion News Network, one of the most hilarious YouTube channels, took this idea and created the below news cast! 
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Want to Escape the Information Age? Google Opt-Out Village is Here!
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Escalator Failure: Technology Dependency to the Extreme!
Just in case you needed a Friday laugh, we thought we'd share a funny video of what could happen if we become too dependent on our cell phones and other technical devices. What would you do if an escalator stopped and you did not have your trusty cell phone to call for help?  Hopefully you would NOT react this way ... The above video was posted by Nuclearho, and loaded to YouTube.com. To watch the original video, please click here.
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